Friday, November 28, 2014
It's coming.
There is only 26 days until the apocalypticesque fight to the death for only the best of the very best deals. You can almost hear the primal roar of a thirty-something year old mother of two as she wrestles the last Call of Duty 23.0 from an unexperienced in the line of duty, wide eyed kid fresh out of college on his holiday break. You observe in horror as she uses her freshly manicured nails to grip the star prize from his trembling hands. He weakly attempts to protest, but his floppy brown hair has made its way into his eyes and by the time he has flipped it out of the way, she is already hurdling across an overturned display of the 50 Shades of Grey Holiday Special Edition Trilogy Pack, and is making her way towards the Apple counter, which appears to be surrounded by a cornucopia, if you will, of human carnage.
Yup, Black Friday is makin' its way downtown, but I wouldn't describe it as a 'walking fast' pace, it's more like the lurch of the near dead cashier as he feebly attempts to escape from the hungry mob outside. Sorry, Vanessa.
Black Friday originally started around 1924, when the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade tradition began, and along with it, 24 hours of busy consumers wanting to complete their Christmas shopping list. The term 'Black Friday' was later introduced as the official title in the 1960s, when black ink was used to account for profit in businesses. Over the years, more and more people have decided to freeze their butts off outside of chain stores, lining up in hordes while others finish off that second piece of grandma's pie.
Along with the staggering rise in popularity comes the numerous injuries and even deaths of urgent customers and workers. So far, seven reported deaths have been attributed to the festivities, and 90 injuries to boot.
Now, I'll admit that I love shopping. I LOVE it. But does it really make sense that we have a national holiday devoted to celebrating the birth of our country and giving thanks for what we already have, then within a few hours, going out and buying more? Does it really make sense to sacrifice that time that you could be sleeping in your warm bed to a tradition that feeds off of your hard earned money and willingness to be the one grabbing the video game from that college student?
So why don't we try something new. Instead of rushing to buy, buy, buy this year, why don't we just enjoy each other's company and the leftover stuffing, because we all know that Uncle Bobby is gonna be sneaking the dish to his bedroom, he does it every year.
I don't know why but your writing style is so cute and this actually made me laugh a lot. So thank you. The description was so good in the beginning that it was almost like I was watching a movie with epic battle scene music playing in the background. I have always despised the idea of Black Friday just because the roots of the "holiday" are selfish and just another weird American tradition centered around capitalist ideals. So yes, let us pig out on some more of that delicious Thanksgiving leftovers and make some amazing turkey sandwiches (and now I want Thanksgiving dinner).
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